And He walks with me

Another Revelation.

Last night I prayed. Out loud. I haven't done that since I was in grade school.

I opened my heart and I got some answers. It didn't manifest itself the way I had hoped, but I hope for too much too soon.

What I learned last night was simple fact. I have read it in the Bible in my youth, I have seen references to it my entire life, but I never took the simple reality of it so truly to heart as I have now.

In scripture, it often says "as God is my witness". In scripture there is talk of those moments where people experience the Holy Ghost or the Spirit or even God Himself.

There is a poem that has (and I pray will continue to) ALWAYS given me chills as I feel the Holy Spirit. I don't know if I was initially so young and innocent when I first read it as to not expect the outcome before it was revealed, but I was truly taken aback by the poem. That poem is entitled "Footprints in the Sand".

Every reference to that Poem that I have seen before this morning has always said "Author Unknown". Today as I searched for it, I found what is apparently an official page, one that gives reference to the apparent actual author. I intend to read more later on, but for now, here is a link to the poem:

Footprints in the Sand

Again I say - that poem, throughout my life, has always brought the Spirit close to me. It has never once failed me.

Yet I still did not see the fullness of its' Truth.

The plain and simple Truth is this - the Holy Spirit is with us always. Yes, I know we have read that and "know" it. But for me, I wasn't taking it to heart.

I have ALWAYS throughout my entire life had a simple problem. I have sought to blame others for this problem, but the problem is my own to bear. I have lived a dual life.

When people are around me, I have lived my life one way.

When they are not, I have lived my life another.

I have always thought - no one is here right now, why must I follow the same principles as if they were?

I have actually seen True worldly impacts of this line of thinking. Children are the most innocent and True imitators I have ever experienced in Life. My son, who is a mere four years old, has begun to pick up on some of the things I have done when "people aren't around". This has some extremely negative implications that I didn't even realize until this writing. For one - I was discounting my own children as people to live up to a certain standard around. Who was I to judge at what age they would suddenly warrant my living to the same standard as the rest of society?

I had even pondered having discussions with my son explaining how he needed to act one way when other people were around (because frankly, it embarrassed me) and another when they weren't. The interesting thing is - even though I thought to have that conversation with my son several times, I never did. I could see through his eyes the falseness of it, even if I wasn't willing to see it through my own. I could see that to try to explain this to him would confuse him. I could see that he would ask a question for which I had no answer - "Why"?

So it is with great Joy that I have discovered an amazing Truth this last night! It is such a simple Truth and it has been with me such a short time, and it has given me such direction and purpose and satisfaction.

The Holy Spirit is with us always. As we know, the Holy Spirit, the Holy Ghost, Jesus Christ, God Himself, they are all one in the same.

So the ramifications of this are simple, but many.

1. We are never alone.

2. God bears witness to everything we do, even in private.

3. The concept I have had all my life of "seeking out God" if I wanted help, of "calling out to Him" if I had some major need in my life, this is all quite ridiculous. God is with me always, inside me. I need not seek Him out, I need only ask.

4. The knowledge that I am never alone is comforting and it provides me with something I have been missing in my life - direction of what to do in my "alone" time. For reasons I cannot explain, I no longer feel so lost when I am alone.

You see, after my recent divorce, I now have times in my life where I do not have my children with me. This weekend in particular; It is my normal weekend without the children, but additionally, I do not have them today, on Monday, as I normally would (because today is a holiday). So this will end up being three days in a row without my children.

I had thought I would be spending the weekend alone, and I was quite loathe to experience that. My first thought was to go seek out various forms of distraction so as to not dwell on this fact.

But now I am actually comforted, knowing that He is with me, and so I go about my household chores this weekend without the heavy heart I had expected. I go about my days with purpose and with fulfillment.

He truly does walk with me.